A bird between two branches

Life is a smidgen interesting right now. I think — hope!– that it’s because I’m at a very transitionary point of my life. Tomorrow I leave my full-time employment of over two years. I’ll be going back to school full time. I will be a university professor this fall, responsible for teaching students. And I’m sort of (?) dating someone. I know, could I please be more ambiguous on that count. Sorry, you know as much as I do! All the change and life stress right now has me feeling… weird. 

For example, I have been super indecisive lately. The Academy of Ballet contacted me to 1) finally pay me my June wages and 2) see if I wanted to teach Irish again this year. I knew after the recital in June that I didn’t want to teach, and I also have conflicts this year that prohibit me from teaching after December. Despite that, I still debated for about 4 days what I wanted to do. In the end I told the studio I definitely would not be able to teach at all.

Or how about my class load for fall? I’ve had my classes figured out since April. Until today, when I saw a different class and added that and had to decide which one would be more useful. Yeah, that would be the class I originally signed up for. Duh. I dropped the other class…

And the dating thing? Well, I have no clue where I’m at on that one. As in, for the first time ever I’m not jumping the gun and thinking into the future a ton, and while that’s a little uncharacteristic, it’s also nice. Living in the moment is not necessarily a bad thing. I’m happy to let things play out as they will, on this count. And in case it doesn’t sound like it, I am happy about dating this guy. Very happy. But it has been a transition too, from a phone/long-distance relationship to actually dating and being in the same city/state/time zone. I guess it’s just part of a lot of change all at the same time.

I very much need something. Stability? Vacation? Sanity? Sleep? I’m not sure, but I hope I figure it out soon.