Gee Whiz

Published by Erica on

I had thought of going country dancing tonight. Alas, my roommates who usually go are busy with other activities. And for some strange reason I lost all desire to dance tonight. (Unrelated to roommates not going.) 

I spent way too many hours last night working on lesson plans. Granted, I’m done and somewhat ahead. I hope it’s worth it. I spent way too many hours today grading stupid little math tests and dumb paragraphs. Granted, some paragraphs showed good creativity and perhaps better compositional value than some I ran across in college but…. Too much time on something relatively insignificant. 

I read an article on Christo, a sculptor/installation artist who is donating some of his collages to the Smithsonian. I miss thinking and talking about big theoretical concepts and art and production and elements of design. I miss college. I miss teaching college, mostly. Given my mood tonight, I’m just going to set my 1st grade class aside and not really comment on them. They deserve better than they would get tonight, because it is a good experience to teach them and even enjoyable at times. But I really miss being around intellectuals. Having a reason to discuss smart things. Knowing people will understand my obscure references. I’m fairly well-convinced that my time in elementary education will be only a stepping-stone… perhaps to Ph.D. work or Ed.D work leading to a job in higher education. I don’t think I empathize with kids very well, nieces and nephews excluded. But my students? Half the time they annoy me. The other half they are tolerable. Rarely they have moments where I get warm fuzzies. It’s not about me, I know. But still. 

Basically, I’m just tired of spending so much of my time on stupid things. And not having a social life in Salt Lake, because I moved from a ward I had just started getting settled into (somewhat). And my  new ward????? I dare not comment on such a public and permanent forum. 

I think it’s time for me to just go sulk in my bathtub with my Kindle. I mean soak. My feet are cold because I haven’t really unpacked my socks because I haven’t built my dresser because there isn’t really room because I still have things in boxes and suitcases because there isn’t a dresser to fill up yet…. And it will help me forget that I was (at one point today) looking forward to cutting a rug with some country moves. Who needs dance when you can finish grading paragraphs???  

Categories: soliloquy


Leave a Reply

Avatar placeholder

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *